[Written/Audio/Action] Transmission 004 - In Which Vastra's Carpet Is Ruined

[eversohungry]

[Backdated to the morning of June 4th.]

[Written]

I am afraid that a rather unfortunate accident has occurred in Community Housing 1 on the first floor. My carpet caught fire last night, as well as a few other things inside my rooms. I apologize for the smell of smoke, but I assure you it was entirely necessary at the time. Today I will be removing the offending articles and I sincerely hope that will do something for the smell. Until then I can only ask for your understanding.


[Audio]

[The recording comes a scant few seconds after the notice about the carpet. Vastra's tone is certainly annoyed and clipped.]

And while I did set my own carpet on fire, it was the product of an extremely ill-spirited joke that was inflicted on me last night. The details of which are unimportant save for this: something must be done about Loki. He remains under the influence of a spirit and I can only reason that the level of his 'pranks' will most likely escalate and could very easily get someone killed.

But I am almost certain this cannot be accomplished by only myself. If you are a friend of his, he needs help that is most likely beyond my ability alone. I will be at home, Community Housing 1, first floor, number four, if discussion must be conducted in person.


[Action]

[While waiting for responses, Vastra is setting to cleaning out her apartment of everything that was burned. Rugs, an endtable, a small sofa... everything is being assembled in a small pile to go outside the housing building. But she's almost certain the stink is never going to leave.]

[At least she's still alive, despite the severity of the situation. It could have gone in a very different direction--and Vastra can't help but wonder if Loki would have put a stop to it if her life had been in more serious danger. She sighs and puts the pointless question to the back of her mind and continues working.]

Comments

[Voice]

[originaljackass]

A little warning would be swell, next time. I got a kid. She could be dead by now.

[Voice]

[eversohungry]

[Oh dear...]

I do apologize. Please believe me, if I'd thought that evacuation was necessary, I would have woken the entire building. [When she'd thought the leeches were real, mass-evacuation had crossed her mind.]

Fortunately it was over before things could get entirely out of hand...

[Voice]

[originaljackass]

Yeah, well we're all real relieved. Why the hell did you need a fire anyway?

[Voice]

[eversohungry]

...My floor was covered in virulent, aggressive leeches and more were coming in the windows. Would you have preferred I had escaped and done nothing to deter them? So they could invade the entire floor?

[Which they would have, if they had been at all real.]

[Voice]

[originaljackass]

Leeches? What the hell do you do in your apartment? I've lived in places with roaches before, and not by choice mind you, but I ain't ever been that messy before.

[Voice]

[eversohungry]

Well they were not in my apartment by choice either. Someone who is still possessed put them there. Via... [Ugh, this word.] Magic. I awoke in the middle of the night and they were everywhere.

I would never, ever keep those disgusting creatures in my living space.

[Voice]

[originaljackass]

Goddamn magic. [That is all Jack needed to hear to sorta-kinda sympathize.] Well good job getting rid of them.

[Voice]

[eversohungry]

They weren't even physically there, though. It was an illusion. [She sighs harshly. This subject is getting her riled up again.] So truly, I was attempting to act for the good of the residents however I only succeeded in destroying my carpet and some of my furniture, potentially endangering the building, and I may have to move out of this room if I can't get the smell out.

[Voice]

[originaljackass]

[And in a remarkably stunning move of sheer stupidity, Jack forgets he has a lizard woman on his floor. He just remembers that there is an incredibly hot woman living next door that he's already spent some time with and that this is probably some equally hot babe ripe for seduction. This is what he gets for failing to use the video option.

So he makes his move.]

Illusions can be a real pain. I've seen more than my fair few. But I tell ya what. Seeing as you were acting for the good of the floor? I got a spare room you can call your own until the Suits see fit to reset your apartment.

action... kinda

[weaponry]

[ Well, Vastra, something has fallen into the bushes outside your window. He's free to grab it and look at the the super powerful incense, ferbreeze and air spray.

You see, last night, Tenten wasn't too happy with the stench, or the occasional smoke rising up from the first floor. So, have this. Attached is a note: You might need this so the rest of us don't suffocate - Tenten. ]

[Actual Action!/Written]

[eversohungry]

[Vastra pulls the various things out of the bushes and examines them. She's familiar with the incense, but this... spraybottle is a strange thing. Pulling the trigger (much like a firearm, is it?) produces a strange mist that she isn't familiar enough with to continue using.]

[But she does light the incense, then finds this 'Tenten' on the network and sends a message:]

Sending something one burns to lessen the smell after a housefire--the irony is not lost on me. But thank you for the thought. I apologize for the inconvenience.

[written]

[weaponry]

[ Tenten giggles at their observation. You know, even though it smelt like burnt polyester and soot, this person might actually be pretty good to hang around with. ]

I figured you're responsible with fires if you lit one to get someone out of your home. And if you didn't burn down my apartment. It won't be inconvenient when it actually starts to smell better.

[written]

[eversohungry]

I can't say I was terribly responsible, to be honest. Only panicked. But I have been informed the room should be restored eventually, and so the smell should be temporary.

[written]

[weaponry]

Well, you still didn't suffocate me or my friends or gave any of our rooms smoke damage. So let's just label this a 7/10 and see how you progress if you ever light your apartment on fire later.

[written]

[eversohungry]

I'm not going to light my apartment on fire again. [She sounds annoyed, too. She didn't try to set her apartment on fire, after all.]

[written]

[weaponry]

Well, one can only hope. [ She doesn't hear the annoyance since this is in writing but she knows this these things can end up repeating themselves. ]

[written]

[eversohungry]

[Derp.]

If my apartment catches fire again, it has most likely been started by someone else. Just keep that in mind.

[written]

[weaponry]

I will. I think I'm going to keep water in one of my scrolls from now on so I can drench an apartment in case this happens again. It'd be easier then trying to stamp it out, or doing something dangerous like trying to smother it with something flammable.

voice;

[trashed]

Maybe if you paid more attention, you wouldn't have set your carpet on fire.

[Sorry, he's not exactly the world's friendliest person.]

voice;

[eversohungry]

True enough... Perhaps if we all paid more attention, none of us would feel any effects of any experiments and we could see through every single trick. Have you considered broadcasting that suggestion over the network?

[That's alright, she's got some snark in her.]

voice;

[trashed]

It's impossible to see through every trick. But a trick to catch your carpet on fire should be pretty obvious.

[That's good.]

voice;

[eversohungry]

And what would you do if you had woken to your floor covered in flesh-eating leeches? I'm curious.

voice;

[trashed]

Someone would have to find me first. But assuming they did, I would take care of the problem and then take care of who was responsible.

voice;

[eversohungry]

Oh, how specific. I wish I had thought of that.

Oh, wait! But I have.

I set my carpet on fire attempting to destroy the leeches. And it might be enlightening to reference the audio portion of this entry regarding 'taking care of who was responsible'. Was that sufficient by your standard?

voice;

[trashed]

Why would you set it on fire, though?

[No, because nobody ever wins in his mind. Oops.]